Day 7 - Feeling sad

"However long the night, the dawn will break"

- African Proverb -

Today is much different than yesterday. It has been a horrible day. I feel so discouraged and sad. Not too long after I wrote Day 6 we received some "news" from Immigration. It seems that our application may take longer than we first thought. It absolutely sucks and I'm in so much self pity right now.


Normally when I feel like this I like to over-indulge in chocolate and sweets. Oh my goodness I am really struggling right now. I'm working late at work tonight and all I want to do is run down to the store and buy myself a nice big chocolate bar. I even tried reasoning with myself as to why I deserve this and that Cadbury chocolate is oh so healthy for me. Just a few minutes ago I got off the phone from Dustin, begging him to tell me it's okay for me to buy a Kit Kat. He just kept encouraging me telling me that I'm strong and that I can fight this.


This is the first time in a week (A week!? Can you believe I've done this for a week?!) that I have had serious cravings for this!


Now.. okay... onto a confession. It was dinner time (at work), I'm feeling very down on myself and the world, and then.. it turns out to be a kids birthday! A birthday cake comes out, we all sing her happy birthday, she blows out the candles... We cut the cake... And a piece is offered to me. And I ate it. Argh! I don't even like cake! If I was going to screw up like this, why couldn't it have been with chocolate!?


You'll never guess what happened after I ate the cake... I had a splitting headache! It's been 4 hours since I had a few bites of the cake and my head is pounding. It came on straight away and just won't go away.


I'm so frustrated!


If anyone has any encouragement or advice or comments or anything.. Please, I need to know I'm not alone! And that I can do this.


I just wish work was over so I could go home to bed and fall asleep and let another day come....


Sorry that this blog post today is so depressing.






My Day:


Breakfast: Protein/banana shake


Lunch: Pineapple/apple/grape juice


Dinner: Green salad


Snacks: That dreaded cake that caused this splitting headache, mandarins, bananas, almonds, carrots